My Friend Barbara

After much prayer, I share a request for a young lady that could really use a community of love and support.

Two years ago, I met Barbara. It was an instant friendship. She has a sweet, outgoing, and likable personality. She had recently “aged out” of foster care. (At the age of 21 you are no longer eligible to be in foster care and all associated support ends on your 21st birthday.) Happy birthday to you! The hope is that by 21, the young person will be on a positive path towards adulthood. Ultimately, there is an expectation that their years in foster care will prepare them with the skills and tools needed to succeed and they will be matched with a loving, supportive, lifelong family. Unfortunately, loving, supportive, lifelong families are hard to find. And so was the case for Barbara, no such family was found. At the age of 21 she was on her own. I was introduced to her by a mutual friend. “l’d like you to meet Barbara. I think you will just love her!” They were right, I just loved Barbara.

In 2018 my husband and I went on a trip to Haiti. We learned about the catastrophic earthquake the country suffered in 2010. It is believed that nearly 300,000 Haitians lost their lives, hundreds of thousands were injured, and 1.5 million people became homeless. At the time of our trip the country had not recovered from the disaster. I fell in love with Haiti and its beautiful people. I saw their strength and resilience. Part of me wished I could stay there forever. I prayed that God would use that trip to show me what He had planned for me in Rochester, NY. He did in many ways. That year I met Barbara. God works in marvelous ways.

Barbara is Haitian. She was injured in the 2010 earthquake in Haiti. Many of her family members were killed that day. She was flown to the US for emergency surgery and was placed in foster care. Unfortunately, finding that loving, supportive, foster family was not her experience. She never found a “forever family” here in the US. Thankfully, she is a strong, resilient, young lady. She has done well on her own, has been able to find work and takes very good care of the things she has. This last year Barbara was diagnosed with breast cancer and had surgery to remove a lump. She struggled with depression during her recovery. She found herself behind with her bills and rent. Through all of this she never asked for money or shared anything with me about her financial needs. She only asked for prayer and friendship. By the time I knew she needed support she was overwhelmed. I immediately thought of Matthew 25:34-40:

“Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me. Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink? When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee? Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee? And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.”

Of course I want to help my friend. She needs a community. She needs to be wrapped in love and generosity and supported all in the name of our King. I am asking my friends, family, and the body of Christ to prayerfully consider joining us in helping Barbara. We are in the process of helping her out of her current living situation and in to a new one and making sure she transitions debt free. Please pray for her health, safety, and spiritual growth. Pray for her favor at work. Pray for the ladies that are loving and caring for her. Pray for genuine, lifelong, friendships and support.

Jill

Join us in helping her financially. It will be a thousand or two or three. Share in the blessing. I won’t share your name with anyone. I can keep a secret. All of your blessing will come in Heaven! I won’t even thank you - just to be sure.

Pete

"Abundantly above all that we ask or think"

A few days after my husband and I had returned home from our trip to Haiti I received a phone call from Monroe County Homefinding. “The Homefinding team just met in regards to finding an adoptive home for a 6 month old baby boy. He is the baby boy with Down Syndrome that you showed an interest in last fall. Do you remember him? Are you still interested?”

Yes, I remembered.

For some reason, since I had gotten home, I couldn’t stop thinking of him. My mind raced back to that little town in Haiti. We were driving with our team to visit another small church/school to check on the progress of their recently built bread oven. As we headed up the bumpy road I stared out the truck window. There were so many children. “Lord, how do I make a difference when there are so many children?” The team members that were riding in the back of the truck were throwing handfuls of lollipops to the kids as we drove along the road. Kids with bare feet and ragged clothes would come running from the bushes, laughing and shouting as they dove to the ground to grab them. I continued to talk to God, “Please show me how I can make a difference when I am one person and there are so many needs.” As I continued to pray with my eyes open, I noticed a little boy sitting all by himself on the side of the road. He was clean and he was wearing nice clothes. He looked very well cared for. I immediately noticed he had Down Syndrome. I yelled, “Stop! I just saw a little boy back there sitting all by himself. He looks like he has Down Syndrome.” How did he survive? Here? How did he get to a hospital for care?” “Please, I want to go back and check on him.” We really couldn’t just turn around. Even if we could, what did I think I could do? I couldn’t get that little, brown face out of my mind.

I told Homefinding, “Yes, I remember him. I would need to talk to my husband and my children, but yes, I am interested. I will call you back as soon as I do.”

I mentioned the phone call that night to my husband. No response. I mentioned it to him again the next day. No response. I know he had heard me. The third day I decided it might be less awkward if I sent him the question in the form of a text. It went something like this, “Hey, I don’t want to pressure you. I know this is a little bit scary but I really need to know what you are thinking? If you say no, I won’t be upset. I do understand. We are getting old. I am already tired a lot and get stressed more often then I use to. Taking in a baby in our 40’s is a huge responsibility. Adopting a baby with Down Syndrome is, well, probably a commitment until we die. So, I don’t want to do anything unless you are sure too. But can you just let me know what you’re thinking? I told the County I would call them back soon.” No response. Several days went by. I continued to pray. Still no response. I decided to send him a list of several “pros and cons.” No response. I prayed some more, “Lord, what would you have us to do? I want to say YES to you. Please, tell Peter what you want. Whatever his decision is I will follow.”

The next week Peter sent me a random text. “I think it is a wonderful idea.”

Hmm? What is a wonderful idea, I thought? The baby?

He sent another text, “Those pros and cons have always been part of the ministry, right? I think it's wonderful. I think we should do it. If we really cannot handle it we know ourselves well enough to seek guidance for what is best for everyone.” I called the County. “Yes! We have decided to add baby ______ to our family. My husband and children say, yes!”

As I drove alone in my van to meet the baby I was nervous, really nervous, but as I pulled into his current foster family’s driveway a peace came over me. The women who had been caring for him met me at the door with a smile, “You are going to love him!”

It was true. As I held him in my arms for the first time, I was overwhelmed with love for him. Thank you, Lord. He had taken my reluctant but willing heart to serve Him and had already blessed me a hundredfold!

As I drove home from that first meeting I thought about that little boy sitting on the side of the road in Haiti. I thought of my prayer that day, “Please show me how I can make a difference when I am one person and there are so many needs.”

He is God. I am not. I don’t always understand His ways, but I do trust His word. I believe I should do something, even if it is just one small act at a time. He is able to use that act of faith and obedience for His glory!

I sit here almost a year later and I am in awe of God’s goodness to my family and our little boy. I often think of that little boy I saw in Haiti and I am thankful for that experience. I love Psalms 84:10-12: “For a day in thy courts is better than a thousand. I had rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God, than to dwell in the tents of wickedness. For the Lord God is a sun and shield: the Lord will give grace and glory: no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly. O Lord of hosts, blessed is the man that trusteth in thee.”

“Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,” Ephesians 3:20

“Defend the poor and fatherless: do justice to the afflicted and needy.” Psalms 82:3

“A father of the fatherless, and a judge of the widows, is God in his holy habitation. God setteth the solitary in families:” Psalms 68:5

“For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.” Matthew 25:35-36

“Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations.” Jeremiah 1:5

Jill